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I know , that its been ages that when I last posted , when I last watched any movie, when I last downlaoded any song , any movie , any novel, any blog, listened to Ghazals, talked to my friends for the whole night, scribbled this blog , Picasa , flickr and what not ! :(

Its already edging the end of this year and my not-so-updated blog was screaming for the last 6 months. 

You can easily imagine my state of mind after reading these lines ! 

So, lets leave this crap , and go ahead. Well, at this moment of time I really dont have any idea what i am typing. Be aware , you still have time to close the browser! lol

The fact is still I have some 50 followers , for all I care and now that i am sitting on this couch right now , I have finally set my cruel mind to write something for sure today. 

Trust me , I dont want to STOP right now!

I know it very well , that it would seem uninteresting to many of you but I just wanted to write something. Please forgive me for this instant. 

Well, I've been around here (Dehradun) for awhile.Not sure I've learned alot, but I've lived alot...sometimes I think maybe I tried packing a little too much in these 23 almost 24 years. Eeesh! Time flies! 

So..here I sit in a downtown cafe drinking coffee alone writing this post ever. This is all part of the new and improved me. Generally I don't go ANYWHERE alone for fear of social rejection, haha! 

No, really though I don't usually do things alone, I don't like being alone but as of late this is exactly what I am, by my own doing (which we will get into later, I will not lay my burdens upon you in this post !)

Well in IIRS (Indian Institute of Rare Species) ,  the agreement of the emancipation of my former destructive self is finding a new course for me. People out here at my college are  pretty horrible..and humbling, but back when I landed this peach of a course I was willing to do just about anything to make my life stable. Now, after 3 months,  I wonder, I should opt for something else. 

So, good news! Today I got my result for my first two modules and they want me to go to the next module ! . At any chance , I want to see what the universe has in store for me I guess.

Netherlands , Germany , Leh , Ladakh , Corbett , Kerala and what not !

I have these reasons to stay happy ;)

Cheers !

PS: Sorry for this horrible post ! :(

How To Commit Suicide ?

Failed in exams? Parents don't love you anymore? The one you love is fucking someone else? You hate yourself? People don't read your blog? People read your blog but don't leave comments? Your job sucks? Your boss is a Doof and your co-workers are back-stabbing motherfukc**s? The whole world is out to get you?

Chill.

We have just the thing you need, fates have guided you to the right blog post, because what you need is a Suicide!

Yes!

Kill Yourself! but [[[How?]]] you ask. The world is full of un-imaginative idiots who have made suicide look like something bad and idiotic, it’s time you took control of your life and the way it should end.It's time You took suicide to a higher level. No stupid cutting, jumping, ropes, guns or poisons involved, this is suicide like you have never heard before. This is what imagination does to you.

Let's not delay the inevitable and move on to the three top slow and steady MY ways to cash in your chips, go west to meet the maker! [why slow and steady you ask? coz that makes sure you win the race ;)

1) Fall In Love--- Love, as they say, is the slowest form of suicide. Once in it, you ARE going to DIE. The road to Happily Never After is littered with evil intentions and broken hearts, you walk a mile in a three legged race of love and the road forks. Sweet. Either you succeed and have a "happy ending" [Ending is the keyword here] or you fail and die bit by bit inside. Very interesting and novel way to die, of course half the world is doing it without even realising it. That is what makes this fun.

2) Chase a Dream-- Dreams are nothing but remains of a bad night's sleep. If you go chasing dreams on mountains of hope, your dreams will turn around and bite you in the face. Then they will jump off the mountain and start flying, while your face will be headed on a super-fast Hello to Mr Ground of Reality. That can break a man or a woman, from inside and when you die there, no glue or doctor can join you back again. Chasing dreams is a risky method and a complex one, slow and simple, but sure.

3) Time Travel!- Now, just as you read time travel, 95% of you would get thinking on the Grandfather lines. Well, get original, grab a time machine from the nearby supermarket and zip back to tomorrow and meet yourself. BOOM the universe will explode, tearing apart the trousers of time and there! the most original suicide in the history of the world. Literally!

[and as a bonus method]

4) Read MY BLOG Everyday--- Congrats, you are already on your way to the pearly gates pits of hell. Word by word these sentences will crawl in your brain through your eyes and push your brain through your ears till there is no more space left in your head for anything but this fucked up blog. A slow, and a very painful death.

Yup that's all folks! But (there is always a but) I shall leave you with a poem by the great Dorothy Parker!




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Suicide is Self Expression. Hope it all helps.

;)

Cheers :)